Questionable

"Why god gave women two boobs"

Quote from J as he took this picture of me (with his crappy cell phone) this morning.

Oh, yes, they call her the streak

An embarrassing one to be recalled at a future wedding or first date:

Two days ago, SIL was looking out the window into the backyard and saw both of the older two kids, each nicely swinging, with their pants and undies down around their feet, little bare behinds hanging off the back of their swings.

In conversation about what was going on two things emerged:

They thought the backyard was private so being naked was okay. (From their backyard, they can probably see the backyards of 7 or 8 other houses.)

They did it because, "it felt good".

Preschool begins

After reading today that Palin queried her city's librarian about banning books, I decided to stop reading about her. It is just too depressing.

So, on that note, something much cuter. The twins went to their preschool open house yesterday. Oatmeal got on the phone with me after they arrived home to tell me what happened. Note, this event lasted one hour. I don't know that they were even there the whole time.

O: We went to the preschool open house today. I have some new best friends.
Me: Great. What are their names?
O: I don't know. I'll have to ask them.
She proceeds to talk very quickly about all the stuff she did there. She babbled so fast, I missed most of it, until I said,
Me: Well, did you learn anything today?
O: No! It was just the open house.

Ha! She sounded like a teenager

The other two also got on the phone to tell me about preschool.

Schmugly, who is only two, had lots to say because she also got to go and play with the preschool toys. I suspect she is going to be very jealous on Thursday when the other two get dropped off and she has to go back home with mom. ReeRee was most excited about all the dress up clothes.

It should be an interesting fall for the older two. I hope that the baby enjoys her alone time with mom.

We interrupt this Nef interruption to bring you birthday wishes

The twins turned four on Monday. Four years old. Such very big, smart, interesting girls. Oatmeal is flipping and dropping on their swing set trapeze like she was born to the thing. ReeRee loves the water. They love learning new words and every time they hear a new one, it must be defined.

They celebrated today by going to Circus World Museum with mom and dad and opening presents from me. I'm rather sad that I wasn't there to see them open the presents, but SIL taped the celebration. I suppose she'll upload tonight after they go to bed or maybe tomorrow if they nap. And, the presents were a hit. In addition to some of the Crayola magical marker paper and pens, I got them each a camera. Yes, I know. They are four. But they love taking pictures. (They take after me. I always have a camera shoved in their faces or taking pictures of their lives.) I didn't get sucked into the princess or other Disney camera scam. ($50 for a crappy .3MP camera. Yep, that's point-three). Instead I bought them the same camera my neighbor bought for his kid (for her fifth birthday). It is a rubber coated, durable digital camera with a little screen on the back. It also has a carbiner-type clip that attaches to a kids' rubber bracelet or other thing like a belt loop. Within minutes of opening the cameras, they had each taken enough pictures to fill the memory cards. So, my brother reduced the resolution. They like to see their pictures on the television and then they are okay to have them erased.

Oatmeal is the fast, assertive talker. She gets on the phone with me and basically very quickly barfs out all the things she wants to tell me. Like this:

Hi Lala. We went to the zoo. There were no giraffes. The otters were funny. They jumped up and down. We climbed up in the tree house and went down the big slide. ReeRee did too. We're almost four now. We're going to pre-school. We got new backpacks. We're going to get to open presents. Bye.

And today: We went to the circus and saw animals and now we get to open presents. We're four. Bye. And later, when they called back: We got cameras for our birthday. We can see the pictures on our television. Bye.

Some random kidisms from the last few weeks:

ReeRee: My favorite animal is a pink, striped, unicorn. It lives in South America, which is very far away.

SIL: Oatmeal, why are you shoving cereal (pink colored) up your nose?
Oatmeal: So, I can have pink boogers.

Once you go big, you never go back

When J and I met, we each had a queen bed. He moved into my place, so we slept in my bed and his went in the guest room. When we moved into our current house, we donated my really old bed and bought a king bed. His bed is still used for guests. You know what the downfall of getting used to a king bed is? You can't go smaller again. We can't stand sleeping in a queen bed anymore. It is hot and squishy. There jut isn't enough room. When we planned our trip up north, we realized we would have a bedroom with a queen bed and a room with two twins. We thought we'd push the two twins together to make a king, but when we got here we realized the twin beds were so soft neither of us could sleep in them. So, what did we do? J discovered that the small couches each pulled out into a twin bed. He lay down in one and was so comfortable, he let me sleep in the queen bed. Each night, he has slept in this really little twin pullout with a thin mattress and has been completely content. I can't even wake him up in the morning he is sleeping so well

Why yes, I am a truck

In the comments below, Christopher recommended I try the following joke on the nieces:
A: Ask me if I'm a truck,
B: Are you a truck?
A: No.
*laughter*

Here are the results
Me: Oatmeal, ask me if I'm a truck
O: You're not a truck
Me: No, ask me if I'm a truck
O: (More adamantly) You're not a truck
Me: Say, Aunt Lala, are you a truck
O: No! You are not a truck
Me: You're right. I'm being silly. I am not a truck.

Me: ReeRee, as me if I'm a truck
R: You're not a truck
Me. No ask me, Lala, are you a truck
R: Lala, are you a truck
Me: No, silly, I'm not a truck
*lots of giggles in response*

Me: Schmugly, ask me if I'm a truck
S: No
Me: Ask me if I'm a truck
S: No

So, maybe they're a little young yet. Oatmeal wouldn't let go of the control. ReeRee loved it, once she got the hang of it. And the baby was just utterly confused. But I got a good laugh out of the whole thing.

The joke's on me

The kids are still really into jokes. But, unless they are very simple, they don't get why they are funny. They like the interactive nature of the knock-knock joke, but also enjoy memorizing other silly quips. I can turn almost anything into a knock-knock joke and they'll laugh. I've been trying longer jokes on them lately. Here is an exchange from two days ago (via the phone):

Me: What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
ReeRee: I don't know
Me: A stick
ReeRee proceeds to giggle

Quickly thereafter, she asks me this:
RR: What do you call a fish that doesn't come back?
Me: I don't know
RR: A fish tank
I proceed to laugh heartily

Incidentally, Oatmeal's favorite (non-knock-knock) joke, which she repeats over and over (probably without understanding) is:

When is a bicycle not a bicycle?
When it turns into a driveway.

This one's for you, Dad (who will never see it)

PS Light posting cuz I'm really trying to get a rough draft of chapter 5 done. I'll be back soon.

A Note to my Father (who doesn't usually read this blog)

Dear Dad,

You vote for him because he is inspirational. You vote for him because he's our best chance to make this country better than it is.

I saw him speak last night. I got in line at 4:30, found a seat around 6:30, and heard the most uplifting speech of my life starting at around 9:00. I stood in line with thoughtful, lovely people all looking for a president with a platform they can support. People of all races, backgrounds, and ages were well-represented in just the few rows surrounding my seats. They were there for the same reason I was. Hope. Barack Obama gives me hope. Hope for a better future for me, for my nieces, and for you.

The police are estimating 50,000 people turned out to see the speech. Only 17,000ish thousand made it inside. Do you know what happened next? Instead of leaving, some of the remaining folks stood outside and watched Obama via large screens in front of the building. 15,000 people stuck around to watch a silent speech. They were only able to read the words on the screen and they cheered along, but really had no idea what was happening inside. If people are willing to stand in a crowd and not hear the speech, just because they want a new president, I can't understand how you, a life-long democrat are considering not voting for him.

Have you seen pictures of the event?

Here are pictures of and stories about the line. We were sort of near the front, but it went on and on.
Here is a slideshow of photos of the speech.
Here are pictures of the people who didn't make it inside.

Dad, you vote for him because you want health care for everyone. You vote for him because you want this war to end. You vote for him because you treasure your state parks and want someone focused on the environment. You vote for him because you have a daughter and three nieces and want to support their reproductive rights. And, most of all, you vote for him because you once told me even a democrat you don't like is better than a republican you do like.

Love,
Me

Would you like some fruit with your laptop?

Today Oatmeal and I were talking about what sorts of things you'd find in her (imaginary) tree house. In addition to beds, a kitchen with a table and a refrigerator, and shelves full of books, she indicated she also had a computer with a pear on it.

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Last night she noticed for the first time the Apple logo on my laptop. I love how kids' minds work.